doggie dreaming



My little doggie dream continues to unfold in the most unexpected magical ways.

I’ve written about my treasure map before.   When I started feeling this irresistible magnetic pull toward getting a puppy, I realized this has got to be somewhere on my treasure map.  I went a’lookin and there, right at the center was this fox.  Carrying a large egg.  With a rhinestone on it just in case it hadn’t captured my attention enough. 😉


 I remember the day I spent hours creating this treasure map up in Prescott and how I waited and waited for my central image.  And the moment I saw this large fox photo and realized that was it. I love making these maps in the almost entirely intuitive way–selecting and placing images based on how they make me feel without fully understanding their meaning.  For me, it’s a way to tap in to this deeper longing that is far beyond the conscious mind that chooses all day long.  It’s like a conduit to the dreams within the dreams waiting to be born.


I remembered the day I saw that fox on this patio down at the Ranch on my birthday trip last year and how I had that instant heartburst watching him scamper across.  I’d been obsessed with foxes before that but that incident sealed the deal.   I spent much of that week with my eyes peeled hoping for another sighting.  It was like someone waved a magic wand over me.


I have several fox images on my treasure map but the central one is clearly the strongest.  It’s the largest image and smack dab in the center.

Contemplating this I realize this fox is a CANINE but also sort of feline.  I’ve said “a fox is like a cross between a dog and a cat”.  I went a googlin this morning and was surprised and not surprised to find this:

Foxes are part of a large family called Canidae, which includes wolves, coyotes, and domestic dogs. They all have long snouts, but unlike most other canines, you’ll find a little cat in every fox.

My friend Max said “that fox represents the transition from cat to dog for you”.  Wow.  Nailed it.

Then there’s the egg. I remember feeling like this was kind of a fierce, almost unsettling image in a way when I put it there but at the same time I knew it was the only one to take center stage.

I was so focused on that egg that I even put that little rhinestone bling over the laminate, highlighting it.  Again, I had no idea why I did that other than it was just what was needed or felt right.  This is what makes the treasure map making process mysterious and magical.  At the point I chose this image I had absolutely no thought of getting a dog anytime in the near future.


Well, as I meditated more on this, I realized my little puppy is an egg right now.  He’s likely not even conceived!  I made this treasure map for this year and in this  year my new little addition is just at the stage of an egg.  This cat/dog fox is presenting me with a blinged out egg!  haha  It definitely wanted my attention and got it!


Last Saturday four of us went to see the Phoenix Metropolitan Men’s Chorus in their summer concert which was fantastic!  It was so great to go see them again and realize Alfonse will be on that stage with them performing in just a few months!  In fact, he starts rehearsals  It was a great evening out and we were all so psyched for him getting involved with this wonderful, warm, welcoming community.  We mingled after the show and he got introduced to several more members.  They even have a 92 year old man who sang from a seat in the front row of the chorus.  How cool was that?

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Before we left, Steve came over and we were talking about my puppy plans.  He has had dogs much of his life so he totally got my dream.  I found myself admitting something to him that I was also admitting to myself for the first time out loud.  That although I’ve lived alone much if not most of my adult life, I go to bed many many nights–both here and in Sedona (more there I think)–with a feeling a trepidation or insecurity.  Not a feeling of total relaxation, feeling slightly unsafe that someone could break in while I’m sleeping.  I’m not as hypervigilant as I once was (another story of waking up at 2am with a man crouched next to my bed in a townhouse I rented shortly after my divorce–I will write that one sometime).  But there is often this lingering fear that disallows me from feeling fully relaxed when I go to bed.  It’s been hard to admit that even to myself.


I was sharing about how I think having a dog will really alleviate that for me and will help me on that very important level of health.  Sleep is a big deal!


The next day I went again to look at my Treasure Map to just browse and look what I found, unnoticed before.  Overlaying my fox image at the bottom are these words:

Get a good night’s sleep

This thing keeps unfolding in the most surprising and charming ways.  I just love it.  Again I feel like I’m listening deeply and following the bread crumbs.  Which is really the way I want to live every single day, untethered by the mundane and tripping down a light filled path.


With my little doggie.  Soon.




In case you haven’t figured it out by now, my favorite thing of all things is serendipity.  I look for it, celebrate it, make decisions by it, worship at the altar of it (ok that’s maybe a little extreme).


wpid-20140826_163323.jpgYesterday I sent it off my submission for the first writing contest I’ve ever participated in.  It was a great exercise and I worked for hours on it over the weekend.  I’m headed back to Edmonds, WA in October for the same writing conference I went to last year and decided this time to enter the contest.  Late last week I got an email and realized the deadline for submission was this Friday!  Eegads.  They also gave the theme which I’d somehow missed so luckily I had a good story that fit perfectly.  The theme is “Catch.”  I reworked a story I shared on the blog about a Priest, a lesbian, a fish and Mississippi.

It was fun whether I win or not and I intend to play around some more with this contest stuff. Why not?  It’s a good way to practice, sharpen skills, learn to edit and in this case realize I’ve been totally sucking at punctuation in some ways…at least consistently!   Here’s to punctuation!!!! !!! !! !!!!!

Imagine my surprise tonite when I got home and decided to channel surf and landed on this documentary on Showtime:

L Word Mississippi:  Hate the Sin

Yep, it’s all about lesbians in Mississippi.  How random, right?  I tried waking her up and dragging her out of bed phoning Max to tell her to quick turn on her TV but she must be asleep already.


Maybe this is a sign…maybe I’m in the zeitgeist…maybe I’m just looking for validation.  😉

The other thing on my mind that I’m obsessing about is…drumroll…getting a dog.  I can’t stop thinking about it!  It started dragging me like a magnet while I was in Sedona this weekend and has just been escalating.  I spent much of my evening yesterday searching on dogs and so far I’ve fallen completely in love with cockapoos.  I think this is my dog…well I know it is.  Here is an assortment of photos that make my heart hurt they are so cute.  Today I’ve been obsessing about names.

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I’m being smart about it though and have decided to wait until the new year, review my last year and see how this new lifestyle will fit and take a good several months to be steadily at home (or Sedona) to train a little puppy.  I haven’t had a dog since I was a child but it’s pulling on me so hard knocking at the inside of my heart that I feel like I hardly have a choice.  I’ll keep ya updated.

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Look, I even have the cockapoo owner haircut! (more or less)

This morning I started looking at my treasure map to see if there was a sign on there and lo and behold, right in the center is an artic fox.  That’s pretty close to a dog if ya ask me.  And I made it the centerpiece of my whole map!  Hmmmm…


The weight lifting lady is the other large image and I’m lifting hard now at least 3 times a week.  My goal setting seems to have wiggled it’s way in to my subconscious and is having it’s way with me.

As I’m watching this hard to watch film in the background, I see a lesbian in a fishing boat.  I hope the judges for the contest are watching too.  😉