Cold morning, hot coffee, down comforter, something to read, something to write on, feather pillow. And the mountain. Hello 54 I think I love you.
Yesterday, the day before my birthday, I woke up at 3 am from a terrible nightmare. My entire body was wracked with fear- terror even- in the dark. Alone.
Then I looked forward and saw the dark outline of Mt, Kuchumaa from my uncurtained window and remembered the words of my dear friend Tracy, who I met here the first time: “give it all to the mountain. Mt. Kuchumaa knows what you need”
I tossed it all toward the mountain and felt all of that darkness drain from my body before falling back in to a deep hard slumber.
When I awoke 3 hours later, groggy and rested, I sat in the window seat like I do every morning with my coffee and my book of poems. Reaching inward as I greet the day. It was a brisk morning but I wanted to feel that freshness so I wound open the large oblong window at my feet and in whooshed the brightest , startling clear breath of frosty air from the mountain.
I instantly picked up my pencil and Mt. Kuchumaa spoke through me.
I gave everyone at my birthday eve party last night a copy with a small sketch of the mountain and read it to them at the table.
Please hear my voice and the voice of this great mountain as I share this poem with you.
Thank you for sharing all days with me and especially this special one.
All good wishes to us all.
That’s Mt. Kuchumaa there in the background and that will be my big view from my casita in just a few short hours. It can’t come soon enough.
Last time I went I developed a leak coming through the ceiling in to my laundry room the night before I left. Tonite I noticed a water build up in in the same corner and realized my water heater has sprung a (slow thank God) leak. What is it about that corner of my house springing a leak right before I head out for this retreat? Things that make ya go hmmmm….
Luckily Lowe’s was still open, I ran over, bought a new water heater and set it up for installation while Steve is house sitting. Oh boy, raining and pouring. If anyone can handle that though he will. I just feel so fortunate he will be here to manage it for me.
I feel like I’ve been working nonstop today. Some last minute issues came up re: Alfonse and his transition and lo and behold they have NOT discharged him from the Act Team yet which honestly works in our favor. He’s on some very tricky meds that almost no pharmacy will even dispense so it’s inventing the wheel to try and figure this out right now. I spent the whole afternoon on it. Arrrrgh.
When he came over at 5pm I was so sound asleep on the couch that I didn’t even know where I was when I woke up. He volunteered to go pick up dinner and run a couple of my errands. Wasn’t that sweet?
I finally got a second wind to finish my packing here at 10:30. Gotta get prepared to unplug ya know. 😉
I won’t be posting I don’t think for the next week but I may put some pictures up if I feel like it. It will be interesting to be so unplugged over my birthday. I think I get a free massage for my bd there! I know I’ll be getting Watsu! Yay!
Here is my casita this time. Can’t wait to curl up in that window seat with my 3 books I’m bringing. One of poetry my client lent me by Robert Housden. I can’t wait to read it. Some memoirs and whatever catches my fancy in the library. I can’t wait to dissolve in to some pages and get lost. With a roaring fire and my cozy jammies.
I’m gonna work out much harder than I ever have this time. Usually I’m skidding in there on fumes but this time I actually have energy and some vim and vigor and going to make a goal to get fit. When I’m not relaxing I mean. It’s a Zumba week so I will be doing a lot of dancing! My favorite!
I’m rambling now.
I’m gonna walk the labyrinth on my birthday and unwind and rewind. I can’t wait to see what’s coming in the next year. I have a really really good feeling about it.
Cheers guys…catch you in a week!
I woke up this morning crazy, unreasonably early at 4:30 wondering if I was really awake or if it was a false alarm. Closed my eyes again to check and no, I was really awake so popped right out of bed. I think I’m feeling so peppy because I’m still groovin on my seriously wonderful day yesterday combined with anticipating my trip tomorrow.
I hadn’t started packing yet so immediately grabbed my suitcase and got a good 90% of that done before the clock even ticked 5:30. Score! Good thing as I have to work today and do quite a few things for Alfonse before I leave town. This transition is going to require some important changes to set up and today is the only day I have to do them so have to make the most of my time. I also want to spend some quality time with him as I’ll be out of pocket for a week.
Yesterday was a magical, sparkly, neon kind of day in so many unexpected ways.
Last year I decided, on my birthday, kind of on a whim to just throw out a mass random invitation for friends to come meet me at my favorite local cafe Crepe Bar on the morning of my birthday. I said “let me buy you a crepe and see you on my birthday!”. I had no idea who might show up so it was even more fun sitting there like a treasure hunt in reverse waiting for the jewels to walk up to me. That’s a kind of good dynamic to have on your birthday now that I think of it!
I discovered Crepe Bar through an invitation I got to attend their pre opening grand opening. I went with my friend, another Chef, the beautiful South African Andrea Kretzmann who I also met on a “blind date” of sorts. I’d been buying Andrea’s savory tarts at the Scottsdale Farmer’s Market for months when she invited me to her pop up dinner at Cycle. She did a charity dinner, serving her delicious South African food, as a fund raiser for a friend who’s husband had been tragically killed. That’s Andrea. It was at that dinner that I spontaneously asked her (then) husband if I could ask Andrea out on a date. With a twinkle in his eye he went back to the kitchen, asked her and said “yes, she accepted!”. We went out the first time to Ignite Phoenix and were immediate friends. I need to spend more time with her and Rocco. Last time I saw her in fact was at Crepe Bar I think! Here she is with Rocco right there!
Anyway, back to yesterday. I decided to continue my tradition and throw out an invite and see who shows up. Even though it was early but I’ll be gone on my actual birthday so this was the day. Last year my “blind date” was Barbara Walters Harris–we’d been FB friends for awhile and she’s in the hood and she came so we could meet in person! What a treat! My favorite local playwright/actress Kim Porter showed up as did my friend Marisa Brazil. Poor Chef Jeff, the entire power was out in the neighborhood that year so he kept serving us the rest of the warm coffee, cold yogurt and granola. We were fine, having a great time til it came back on. My Dad was in town so he was there as well as Alfonse of course.
me with Chef Jeff
Since then I’ve become a regular at Crepe Bar, have gotten much closer to the creative and inspired Jeff Kraus and all his staff. I’ve noticed a young hipster named Chris always sitting in the back left corner with his headphones, working. Chris and I have been running in to each other for years. I saw him first at Andrea’s pop up dinner, then he sat next to me in a restaurant in Sedona a few mths ago (I know, how random) then ran in to him at Late Night Love. I was so delighted to see him when I got there yesterday at 10 and he joined me for a mimosa and we really got to know each other. What an interesting fellow!
me w/ Marisa and if you look super closely you can see Chris and his glasses on his perch in the back
Soon, people started trickling in. I think Marisa was first, then Marianne I think, then Angie, then this brunette bombshell walked in with big sunglasses and a smile saying “Kathy? It’s Shina!”. I met Shina a few years ago at this crazy Snuggie Pub Crawl and we hung out all evening. We became Facebook friends, she reads here she told me (hi!) and she lives nearby! She was my “blind date” this year! Love it! We made plans to start a walking club together..she’s serious about it I can tell. I need that kind of motivator!
Julie and her long hair soon walked in and of course Alfonse came early on. He just ate and stayed a bit as he had an appointment but I was sure glad he came.
Joilyn arrived bearing white cyclamen and champagne. In fact there were a few bottles of champagne and it being a byob place, they provided the OJ. 😀
Chef Jeff, as usual, kept bringing out tidbits for us to try from delicious sweet salty porridge to granola with the fluffy aerated yogurt done table side to fresh made sweet potato chips with some kinda fairy dust on top to his deconstructed sweet potato/yuzu/ginger pie he’s making for pie social and competing with. Wow. Amy’s Pie Social. My friend Amy I mean. This world of mine just keeps getting smaller…in a good way.
We all ate, drank, pulled Angel cards and chatted, hugged, etc. Good vibes all around! I pulled the card Sustenance and still need to read the description. In fact I may take those cards to the Ranch. I will make new friends there and I think we will do some card readings. 🙂 I can read all about Sustenance while being sustained down there. 😉
After all that merriment, Mari helped pack up my car and I split to rush down to my next sparkly wonderland–my hair appt with Morgan Hope. Speaking of sparkle, she used this new metallic glaze on my color called…check this out….champagne.
I walked in with a chilled bottle in my hand knowing she had a frig and an assistant Kaylan who loves bubbles. Immediately I ran in to a gal sitting at the shampoo bowl and offered her some and she brightened right up “really?” . “Of course, I have more in the car” I replied with a wink. We ended up going through 3 bottles that afternoon. Kaylan had one of her own. Cheers!
Ironically I got there early so this gal and I visited as she told me how she came in there wishing their little cafe sold wine “so when I saw you walk in with that bottle, I was really hoping…” Voila, prayer answered.
While I was sitting under the steamer, an email came in from my dear Watsu guy Sebastian, remembering I’m coming down this week offering me to be his demo in TWO sessions (that’s huge). The fact he remembered I’m coming this week, offering me that (it’s a $180 session and I will get two mini ones so he can demo plus my full BD session! talk about a rebirth!) is such a sign of good things coming in all around me right now. This vibe I’m tripping on…it’s just psychedelic! Sustenance indeed.
me w/ Sebastian last summer
Morgan gave me this great asymmetrical funky hair cut. I love it. I just hope I can style it half as good as she does.
I had a great time being there on Halloween with the Stepford Wife and Zombie and Frankenstein. They all do it up there. It was a bit disorienting when Morgan , with a knife in her torso, would stop in her tracks and get this dead look on her face and freeze when a camera came around. It was hilarious actually. I was in there for 4 hours and still not enough time to catch up. Morgan insisted I make my next appt her last in the day so we can go out after. I have no problem with that!
Mari and I had talked about getting together later for a snack as I’d be in her hood. I knew she’d be in yoga so popped in to Citizen for a ginger ale (enough alcohol for the day) and a small bite while waiting for her. I ended up in a date with Freddy Krueger!
awww true love
Zipped over to TJ Maxx while biding time and got some new soft pj’s for my trip. I love new pajamas when I travel. I don’t know why.
By the time Mari got out of yoga at 8, she had various texts from me ranging from “grrrr” to “does Scottsdale not believe in gas stations?”. I’m not kidding I was driving and driving and not a gas station to be found. I gave up and met her at the restaurant–the gorgeous Rancho Pinot we’d been talking about. Both shocked I’d never been there.
Of course Mari knows everyone in the restaurant industry in town having worked PR in that biz forever. It’s fun going out with her. We sat at the bar of course and the beautiful Chrysa Robertson, chef and owner hung out with us quite a bit. She’s a hoot. Back to Amy, she did a recent story on Chrysa and had told me I would like her and she was right. In fact as we were talking about Amy, she sent me a note after having seen my “check in” on Facebook to tell Chrysa hi. Serendipity.
Chef Chrysa’s hand casting a spell over the fettucini
Mari and I shared fettucini with butternut and duck and lamb gnocchi. We said it was an early Easter dinner (I know, bad). I’m so glad I had a bit of a sweet tooth because I tasted the most delicious dessert I’ve had all year: lemon verbena panna cotta with passion fruit syrup, persimmons and pomegrante. Unreal. Just an explosion of flavor.
We met the Geico money man and Mari introduced me to Nils Lofgren, Springsteen’s guitar man and his wife Amy who told me to put my geranium leaf garnish in my bra and I did. 😉
We finally said goodnight at 10:30 and I headed out with my low gas gauge. Imagine that it showed I had 29 miles left, then it went down to 26 and suddenly the needle went up half way home showing I had 30 more miles. I took that as a sign that I have an abundance of sustenance, an angel was giving me fuel and I’m safe always. I hit every green light on the way home.
What a day. What a send off to this sometimes arduous 53rd year. What a foreshadowing of things to come. Keeping my eyes open for doors, windows, energy moving and I’m moving through it all. Green lights all the way. So much love and abundance and sustenance and joy and laughter and deep meaningful connections flowing my way.
I’ve been listening to this song for 15 years in my Fascial Dance class while guiding people to sink deeper in to support while offering it at the same time and rising energy up up up at the same time. I do think things have gotten easier. Thank you to All that Sustains All.
Livin the dream people.
Thanks for coming along. xo